Flintstones of the woods?

So the latest commercial features the bears becoming Green, thus they drive a very Volkswagon Bug-looking vehicle complete with a wooden bumper and daisies for headlights. Have I lost my damn mind or is this the most bizarre in a series of bizarre commericals?

First of all, let's examine this. Now we have a family of bears and they do indeed shit in the woods, but they use toilet paper to wipe. They hang the rolls on tree branches and Papa Bear will actually read the paper while snapping one off.

What the hell is he reading? The Wall Street Journal? What publication is delivered to the woods? Does a boy come around on a bike and throw it at the cave, or is it sent via the mail? What's he interested in? The market? The Want Ads?

The bears, who in their natual habitat would be perfectly ecological, are worried about conserving resources and recycling and driving a hybrid, I guess, judging by their vehicle.

I think it runs on a combination of bear-power, a la Fred Flintstones feet, and batteries? E-80? Help me out here. Where are they going in their punch-buggy? The supermarket to buy more Charmin?

These commercials are full of disturbing images. Bears with flakes of paper on their asses. A friendly duck who recomends wet paper for a really good clean. (The bears could just use the duck and skip the wet paper...) Bears playing football. Bears eating ice cream. These damn bears do more fun stuff than I do!

I resent the fact that the bears have a better car than I do. I want daisies for headlights dammit!